It`s one of the dirtiest little secrets in the music busines: You don`t really make money on singles. Never did. In and of themselves, they were always too unassuming in their brilliant simplicity for anyone to believe they should cost more than they did. So despite the perfectly blissful nature of this perfect invention - the first portable complete-sensory experience - they had to go and invent the LP, Wich was rarely more than a significantly more expensive collection of singles, before graduating to the even more lucrative double live album from Japan, until they could start the hole thing over again by making you buy everything for the second time on CD, then yet on Mini-Master-Gold-Disc or whatever they call it now. In the process, the single ceased to have any meaningful life beyond its purpose as an ad for yet another 70 minute album, out of which maybe, on a good day, 40 minutes mattered at all, the rest there only to make you feel you were getting your money`s worth. Of course you weren`t. All you really wanted, or even needed, was to hear that song again, over and over and over. Until your parents went nuts, your teacher expelled you, your girlfriend put up, and the cows came home. As inventions go, it was way ahead of even cool stuff like split atoms, Coke bottles, and the lightbulb that goes on when you open the fridge. Oh Yeah! Records and Motorpsykkel are proud to offer the cure for the fatigued post-industrial consumerism blues. The remedy, a deconstructed "She Loves You" paired with a hearty "Seasons in the Sun", is to be taken internally on a permanent basis until symptoms subside; usually this takes on the form of uncontrollable twitching at the corners of your mouth, the involuntary, exhuberant tapping of feet, and a significant lack of tension from eyebrows to shoulders. You might experience a tingling sensation in your ears, as well as the odd jerk from your long-mordant libido; these too are normal reactions to good singles. In children double dosage is recomended. A warning: It should be added that the notable lack of irony in this music was unavoidable, given the source material, and the following gestation period, wich in the case of "She Loves You" adds up to at least 15 years. It`s a long time to wait for three minutes of pop music - but the three minutes of a single were never like three ordinary minutes. It was always three minutes that could make time, even the world, stand still. And then you could hear it again. And again and again. And with this record - excuse me, single - you can again. Now, just tell me - how do you make a few really cool nicks and scratches on this thing?

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