Naiad Dawns, and the Tea Time Chronicles

Lost, Weathered and Found

A grey sunday, as they can be sometimes, and we tried our best to break the grey sunday feeling with a trip to my favourite tea house. It's all victorian and lovely, just the coziest place in town.

We discussed shape, and expressing feeling through it. The challenge, the path..

I discovered the word 'weathered' the other night. Touched by the elements, element-kissed? The effects of this can be absolutely stunning. I think I'm going to implement more of that in what I do.

Wings

A beautiful configuration these days, particularly today and tomorrow. I have Venus in the same place thrice today. By transit, by progression and natally. - This doesn't happen to anyone who doesn't have a retrograde Venus. Neptune and Jupiter are in the bunch, of course it's a magical time in my life.

As far as I can tell, this is what's been introduced to me...

Barred Owl spirit
I've always been a Cat, particularly a Bobcat or Lynx, but I have felt the Owl come in recently. I don't know anything about owls so I had to look at the species, and it's definately the Barred Owl.

I don't know what the connection between the Owl and Venus is, but both have come at the same time.

What can I say about my Venus journey? It concludes with fireworks this year.. At the start everything was just normal and happy, when it was still moving back, but when it switched gears things did change, for the worse. I began to feel unnattractive for the first time. I began to change and tried to find ways to come to terms with those changes. I went from one thing to the next, to the next just trying to be happy with myself. I started putting on make up, I tried to do the typical venus thing, and it just wouldn't work.

I didn't feel love in my life, I just felt all kinds of superficial attractions. Everything fabricated, false, and unsatisfactory.

It's been a long and painful journey, but this baby caterpillar is finally testing her brand new wings.

As for the Owl, I feel this one is about my personal journey with wings. Wings come to play here also, because as a Cat, I needed to survive. I needed to be agile, quick, perceptive and clever. Use grace to get out of sticky situations, see what's beneath the faces and situations, jump and gracefully land on my feet, while keeping the other half of me on the other side.

I didn't feel safe, or that I was in a safe enough place to be able to really be who I was, and live as I wanted to. So I needed Cat to get me through and out of that.

Now, I'm out of that, and have been for some time. Time that bought me the ability to mend and heal. And I no longer need quick reflexes, I no longer need to keep jumping and landing on my feet. It's time to glide through the air with the wind under my wings. It's my space, it's me safe and blooming.

I can be swift when it's needed but it seldom is. I just feel a tranquility all around me, and the beauty of just being. Just letting your inner self spark right through.

And nicely enough, I hardly meet opposition.

I'm Lynx at heart, but a new friend has arrived and I welcome her with wide arms!

I had a little breakthrough yesterday when I completed a pendant that defines very well the kind of style I'd been searching for. It's beautiful but it's just a draft, really, because it's the start of that place that I'm going, but at least I can really see the light I'd been searching for.

Sparks

I'm making an apple pie today. I think this is the first one I make, I can't remember..

But where have I been? In a very active place, too active to have a sit down and write things down. Everything is electric, just flashing through channels and currents, and when I'm jammed up or tired I just rest in a nothingness. Then back to creation.

I'm polishing things a bit more lately, I've wanted to really distinguish the design, both to make it my own and to make things easier for myself and have a steady routine or pattern to go with.

Every time I sit down to create something, it's another attempt at a better one than the last, or at least a more original one than the last. I'm moving forward, I'm integrating more colour and different textures. I'm experimenting with the design a little.

Also trying to shed a bit the human design and get into a much more faery or elvish design. Not the typical fantasy kind, but one more linked to nature, less controlled, more asymetrical and spontaneous.

With the shitloads of virgo that I have, it's a real challenge to express spontaniety. It's a challenge but a really important one that I have to get through. Possibly the key to everything I've wanted.

My knees have been trembling every time I think of LOTRO Shadows of Angmar. I had been waiting for that game for like 2 years, and it just took too damn long to come out so I put it out of my mind. But it's out right now and it looks so good!! I want it :§

I'm a little depressed today. I think it was the sudden rush of information from yesterday, some of the mystery that fueled me seems to have vanished.

The innevitable loss after having gained an objective. So this is this, and that is that. Who would have thought questions were so precious.

I feel out of questions, that might be it. I can't find anything to aim and shoot for at the moment. Not while I've this stuff to sort out in my head first. Or plain deal with.

This has happened before, and it did when I tried to define Faerie. I just called it Crystalline Realms, but what are they? Sounds like something out of the care bears, something kinda cheesy. Well, I've also been put on the task of living without definition at least 10 mins a day. While I've tried so hard to define the indefinable, just so I can make it solid. Bring it down and experience it in living colour. Bah.. I can't think of anything more emotionally challenging and distressing to ask of me.

I define inspiration when I create something, a piece of jewelry, something pretty ont he computer, or a wardrobe. It's magic. But to just leave things in that gassesous state, undefinable, and try to be happy with that, it's... I can't even find a word, and shouldn't even look for one or I fail in this objective. Although finding the right word would have been great fun.

And I was just starting to get really good at this defining business, for the sake of a better life experience, and being understood.

I loved playing this game.

I'm feeling at odds, and vulnerable. All stirred up inside and just unable to accomplish anything.

I'm also disgusted at the roles women have portrayed, and continue to portray in the world. Definitions incoming: A prize, a fashion accessory, a status symbol, a maid, a sex toy, a punching bag, a beard. Even more disgusting when they willingly take on these roles. - Totally disgusting..

I'm too upset to have the will to put up with the ordinary stuffs that I don't like.

Remnants of Atlantis and the Fall

Back in the little island in the Caribbean where I was born, one morning I awoke from a very vivid dream. My family and I were going on a tour through the area. It was a place we arrived on boat, like an island, and there were ruins.

Just like any other type of old ruins, this one had become a tourist attraction and we attended the tour.

The place would tremble at random, and you could hear the moaning of a woman when this happened. The guide had said that it was the spirit of a mother, who had lost her daughters tragically when the place fell.

There was a big sort of screen or window near by, where I saw images, like movies, when the trembling took place.

One of the images that I remember now was the place as it was then, it was beyond glorious. Pure shimmering white structures, pools, exotic animals and plants graced the place. And there were two young ladies in white robes laying by a pool, both had very long dark hair braided very intricately. These were the daughters, and I was one of them.

I'm connecting dots, and suspecting my issue with water has to do with the fall. Because I both love it, but can't handle it in too big amounts, or big enough to have things under it. So I spend time with the Naiads and stick with my lakes and pools.

The new place is a different place, different realms, I think the Crystaline Realms. But the connection is here, where it all begins. At least where it all begins in Gaia.

I've wondered who this sister is, if she's alive now, where. if we've already met or not.

Will going through water be an antidote or has it happened before? The chance is in my chart, so who knows. But I dread it terribly.

Thinking of Sisters

Been finishing off some work and listening to whatever bit of new Tori Amos music I can find on the net. The album comes out in May, not sure I'll have the spare cash for it then, but I have to get it. I love all Tori music, but this is a particularly good one.

She's in the small handfull of people I'd like to meet before I (or they) die.

She'd always been like a magic treasure, saved only for very special times, or her music always evoked such strong emotions in me that I could only save it for the right moments. She doesn't just sing her music, it's so multidimensional.. It's rare when music from a voice reaches so many levels, but this woman is so incredible that it does. Hell I love to just watch and listen to her talk. That alone brings a wonderful serene feeling.

Which is probably why so many people love her, it's very sublime, and very real.

I didn't start to really know more about Tori until my girls took my in for a dive. It was a time of healing, and Tobaira was the gate keeper. That night I was in a beautiful lake under a bright moonlight, surrounded by mermaids. They asked me to dive in, and I was so afraid. I've had hydrophobia since I was a baby. I can swim, but not in waters where I can't see what's beneath, no sea weed or rocks, etc. Certainly not in the dark either.. I can't even look at pictures of under water things!

But they aided me and I took the plunge. - After that it was all Tori for weeks.

I learned alot of things, I healed alot of things too.

So I think of her as one of my sisters even though we haven't met, and she's as solid as the chair I'm sitting on! Her music puts that moonlight, those waters, Tobaira and the mermaids right in front of me.

Constructing the Whole

And I thought how swell it was that I could go on for almost 2 days in a row without sleep. Ha! Sleep will get cha! And it got me. As a result, I spent the past 2 days just HAVING to sleep midday, because I just couldn't stay up..

Well, I think I've cleared out my sleep bill by now, and I've finally completed my new site! 24 items listed, and the ones I'm still finishing before they can be put up for sale.

It will be wonderful, on monday I can finally get my hands dirty again and resume my magic works: beading, wiring, painting and claying.

I still have to order some cards, and sew my display cloth for the market.

I don't think I've been this excited about my creations before, or as confident. I really love what I have for sale, and often remind myself to make 'another one of those' for myself, but end up making something new and then selling it!

But overall, I'm just happy to have finished one big part of the whole! Ponderings and reveries will be back when the whole is 'wholer' than it currently is.

Talk about wanting to get busy and wildly glamorous. Busy is in check, waiting for the glamour.

The Petty calls of the Petty, and Staying True

I've been trying to avoid any mention or the simple act of making a big deal out of it. But I want to get a few things out, hopefully for good.

The morning of that horrible event in the USA, that took place a few days ago, I had somehow brought back in mind, after a series of what I call "pointless" nightmares, the memory of a movie I wish I hadn't watched. It's about some children that have gone wild somewhere in Brazil. One of these did the same thing the young guy in the USA did.

I have an emotional memory, so I pretty much remember the feelings, then the thoughts that come along with it. How he had no value of life, how he was uncontrolled, how he had so much to learn. Alas, the reason I do my best to forget about any of these incidents or anything of this nature is because I try to find a cure. It's what I do, as a healer, I'm always looking for cures, and in these cases, there is no cure.

Either the people don't exist (movie characters), or it's a lost cause, something that needed to happen for reasons only a mind able to grasp a picture too big that mine fails to understand. I'm sensitive so I will pick up on these vibes, but this is not where I am, energetically. It's like an unpleasant visitor ringing your door bell, trying to sell life insurance, or some religion. So there's really no point in giving it any attention.

But I *hate* when I get these events of something extremely unpleasant coming ot mind somehow, then being thankful that it was only a thought or an idea that isn't or hasn't happened. Then it does.

Aside from that, I've been finishing my beautiful website and doing my best to stay clear of these intrusive angry vibes that are just exploding everywhere, and keep its energy flowing beautifully.

Soon it will be as complete as it needs to be to be uploaded, then I can continue to work at my table. And hopefully have a nice stack of goods to keep my vibes flowing at a comfortable pace while I do what I do.

I've been pretty focused because I enjoy it so much, but I don't like feeling too rushed.

Pieces Getting Closer

On this day, sleep has been a stranger. I can't conceive it at all. I've been drenched in creativity, and every curve that it posseses. But I'm so pleased with the results, although they've twisted in so many ways. I wanted to really grab the essence here, and I think I pulled it off very well for now.

While I used to work with a concept and harmonize it, I wanted to really get to the heart of something more personal with this one, from this point I feel that it can only evolve as is, rather than get another full revamp because I didn't quite manage the last time.

We'll see..

Plumevine has an almost complete new website, there's not a whole lot of flashy in it. It's not giving out any commercial pitch but gets almost dead near to my heart.

In other words, it's not something that just looks attractive, but it's the closest to the truth I've managed so far, with a bit of makeup on it.

I have been utterly busy to say the least, I just can't get myself to wind down and sleep. I have to leave taking the pictures for tomorrow possibly. My camera isn't that great, so it might have to wait till I can access a better one. But that's really the last thing needed for it to go live.

If I manage tomorrow then I'll do that. For now I will modify the current photos of my previous work and make a spot for them.

My new site needs more moons, it needs a bit of more raw nature magic, but so far, it's going much better than I have managed before.

Stepping through the Prism

My last post got eaten by the service, and I just left the title alive. The ever elusive time has been made use of to every extent lately. There are no moments of boredom, but the only moments of inertia are those where I think about what I feel like doing the most first.

There's plenty to be done, all of which is great fun.

I want to start over with my jewelry works, as far as how it will be known and such, its face needs a makeover and I'd been going over that for some time now.

I'm very keen on presentation, and the energy is much more fine-tuned to me, it's more rooted to my essence so I want to do the same with the presentation. I have a name picked out, but I'm not yet 100% sure of it.

I feel like there's so much going through my creative channels that these things which are normally easily figured out, are taking longer than normal.

Then there's the whole reclaiming our apartment bit. It's been working out well also, little by little the place becomes nicer, feels nicer..

I just need new music to create the right atmosphere for me to work in. I like to burn incence, and if I'm in for a treat have one of my favourite movies playing in the background, but I have been craving some sounds I can't just put on the music box. So I'l have to invest in a cd or two and fill that gap.

I can't leave the fantastic weather out, it's been awesome. It's much warmer now, even though the skies change quite fast, it's mostly bright and beautiful.

Buds are coming out from the earth, a fresh feel to the year is starting.

I've been having sparks of insights, but I'm always too tired or busy to put them down, and when I decide to take the moment to do it I'm just drained and it doesn't happen.

A Prism in a Basket

Bouncing

I saw this on a website today, it's disturbing. Sums up the whole traditional medicine system. So I heal myself from the core to the bark.

Thursday was funny, we had a fun, energetic day thanks to the rush of having little time to do things.

It wasn't a smooth process but it was fun nonetheless. I got myself signed up for the 12th of May, and hopefully every saturday after that. It's a bit ironic how similar it is to the game and raiding. You sign up ahead of time, if there's enough people then it takes place. You show up to the appointed place, at the appointed time, bring your goods and enjoy.

It's exactly a month from now so that should buy me some more time to accomplish more for the big day. Such as getting a nice cloth to cover the table, display props, and promotional material like business cards. I'm having fun with it so far, but I'm so tired today I can't do justice to all the new things I got.

And there's more..

Empty Spaces

There was dirt on the windows this morning. And we live on the attic of a 4 story building. The wind blowing on the walls and windows outside was pretty striking last night, the storm seems to have gone today, at least it's quite calm and I hope it will be sunny for thursday.

I've been preparing props and things for the market, and crossing my fingers that my spot will be available. I'm going to see the lady who arranges it tomorrow and get the deal done.

It's the second day that I awoke with a bad lower back pain. P thinks it's because of the way I sit at my work table, I don't know why it's started, but hope it will just go away. Some things start like this and just stick till you get used to them. I hate when that happens.

I'd been feeling sad today, it could be that my period is approaching. It has a tendency to purge any dormant bad feelings out. Those we try to cover up with pretty things and forget that are there..

Like how lonely I constantly am. I'm hoping this market will open new doors for me, give me an opportunity to meet people who share my interests. Have people meet me as the person that I am, without expectations or pre-dispositions.

I've had to dissapoint a good share of people already who were heavy on these, and needed to learn a thing or two.

It feels like ever since I came to this country everything was already set out for me, and I didn't like it, but had not much of a choice than to deal with it, play along while I patched myself up again in the background..

It can be terrible when you think the fight is over, that it's time to breathe and a harder one hits you in the face.

I feel together enough now to start something of my own, undo this spell I'd been put on and have my life back again. Heck, a better one.

THURSDAY

All I can think of is THURSDAY, THURSDAY!

That's when I'll have money again. I've made a list of the things I'll get, new beads & ribbons, my favourite toys! I'm trying to help P get a creative space of his own in the apartment, and hope that will lessen the time he spends playing the game..

So we'll get a few things to accomplish that. And a beautiful indoor plant pot where I can finally grow some herbs and flowers. Amazing the joy such a small thing can give. I'm already thinking about which herbs I'm going to put in it, information on how to nurture them properly, where the lighting will be, etc. This will help so much not only with making better food, but concoting natural beauty products.

And well, the presence of plants is lovely.

I cleaned the table a bit today, and it helped get some creative energy moving, I made a new pendant, with labradorite.. It's a start.

Star Notes

Like full moons and periods, which will drag the current issue till its very last day when it all concludes, transits will be felt degrees earlier, but conclude on the degree where it makes contact with a natal position.

I began to feel odd on my body days before Mars reached the exact degree of my DC, on the day of the conjuction my illness concluded, and was gone the following day.

I healed a personal wound regarding communication, being open and willing to connect with others from the heart, the day Venus reached the exact degree of my natal Chiron in the 9th house, opposing Uranus in the 3rd.

The following day news of a business opportunity came. For which the arrangements will be concluded the day Venus reaches the degree of my MC (ruled by Venus).

The day Venus reaches the degree of my natal Venus (in the 10th house), will be the first of a series of days where this event begins, although so far I'm not set to attend on this day, I wonder if I will get a spot that day after all.

Progressed Venus is conjunct natal Venus this year (natally retrograde), it will be a double conjunction, with transiting Jupiter opposing. I can't imagine an uneventful day, but I have been pigging out on sweets that just suddenly appeared. I've been letting it happen! Telling myself that it's there, and it's rare when I actually eat cake. That some cake isn't going to make a difference anyway. Amazing how blind to the obvious we can be. Though I admit, I love how we're so irregular with our bodies. The fact that all women sacrifice and allow, suffer and enjoy nourishment. How big of a part it is in every woman's life yet how secretive we are about it. - I will probably eat too much candy, spend too much money, and definately something important about career.

I have a project that will take many months if not a few years to conclude, in mind. Aside from the jewelry stuff, we'll see how things go when I get to display them.

The Spark on the Petals

Can you make anything out? I can't either. That's what my table always ends up looking like, and no matter how much I try to make it tidy, it will always end up like that. I've decided it will remain like that from now on.

The magic that births on that table, my children, still incomplete. Either drying, or waiting for new things to be added (on thursday).

There was a tea party today, with vegan chocolate cake. I will go into the details of this cake: I found the recipe here. It turned out lovely, and BIG. So now I can't help but push chocolate cake on my husband, and as soon as I get hungry, I will eat cake. I don't want it to go bad, that's the curse of a whole cake in a place of two.

I've contemplated planets in the 4th house. I tend to overlook them, but they say so much about a person's true place, or feeling of safety. I realized it today when P asked why was I watching, or playing in the background while doing things, that harry potter movie again. I told him it makes me feel at home, happy, and safe. Then I saw neptune sitting in the 4th house and it all made sense.

It's the transition part that always hurts. Bright days, when you have to go out and see as CLEARLY as is possible, the true reality of things. Very different from the one I'd just been happily in. That moment where everything must be switched, I put my normal suit on, I try to break right through it. I hope to change things around, pick my place, my people, my job, and not have to deal with that transition process ever again.

The Solid Dilema

The things we do to ourselves, in order to survive. I'd been comparing practicality vs impracticality. I'm prone to the latter, but then, I'm not. I keep away from drugs, but I'm addicted to other worlds. The kind I visit in my day dreams and night dreams. In very few occasions I got to experience the night dream in the day, which is more intense and 'real'. As if I was looking through a glass window, I saw a green world, little old fellows sitting on mushroom caps, wearing pointy hats, having a meeting of sorts. Another time there were two small beings, looked like your typical alien but were not. Dragging a man's body accross the ground and then I got spotted from behind the bushes where my view was. They started making funny faces at me.

I have no doubt in the existence of all that we can imagine. How substancial any of this is depends on how much, and by how many it is imagined. Have we all created these places and beings? Or did we tap into them, already existing. The chicken or the egg, which came first?

I've always had the better part of me on these other places and for a while, my physical existence became like a prision. - I've come to terms with things a while ago, and seen the potential in having a body and being physically alive.

Then comes the issue, practicality vs impracticality. How do I choose to live? How do I choose to earn my bread in the world? - I'd probably not manage something that wasn't earthed in some way. So I choose create objects of inspiration, leaning towards other worlds yet holding a practical element. It feels like an excuse to myself, so it's ok to create them. But who knows, maybe that's the better way to inspire, put the magic on the most average of things, and turn the average into the magical?

If there was an ultimate goal I could put into words, that would be it.

I'm having a bit of a creative constipation right now. Unfinished things just laying on my table, and I can't see each for their exclusive qualities and beauty, but I'm feeling very generic about them. I hate it.

I probably just need to take a break. Then I feel I'm slacking, my deadline isn't too far off and I have to always keep a tight eye on myself, not to wander astray from duties. As I can tend to do..

There's probably a good book about the creative process somewhere. With a nice troubleshooting guide I could really use right now.

Return of the Ice

The weather turned, and there's been on and off snow storms, no light coming through the windows which are covered in snow. Took a walk, a long walk in it today and can still feel the chill in my bones..

It's these times of darkness and cold that make me seek out the best warmth and nurturing possible. I crave a cup of myth, and fantasy. Harry Potter films, faery art and lore.

I've been wanting to develop a better relationship with my froud oracle.

I've also wondered if I've gone way out of touch with the normal things in life. For instance, I love the practice of eating healthfull food, I don't even like fast food, I don't like popular culture, things like music festivals (too noisy and chaotic), sporty clothes and most of the clothes popular fashion lines dish out on boney models with pretty faces.. I don't like being cold, I don't like listening to the radio because the music I like I'd rather listen to directly, than risk llistening to music I don't like. I don't like horror films, films about politics, murder or anything that is depressing, don't like going out to get drunk, or to a place with loud noisy music and/or loud noisy people. I think people who invest their time in humour, regardless of how 'pointless' it may seem, are making a wonderful investment of it. My opinion of an apparent bad person tends to disagree with others' because I'm seeing a different person, or the person behind the hurt.

I just don't get it why I feel like such an alien when I *know* there's people out there, mostly the ones I get to read about; musicians, writers, artists, who seem just like me and there's nothing so exceptional about them other than their talents.

I feel so young and sane with myself, yet so old and insane when I'm around most people..

I probably need to keep searching for my brethren.

This weather is a real pity. P's off work and we can't go out on our pleasure walks, or a picnic.

I woke up with my body feeling normal again today, my powder consuption has been resumed.

I've also been contemplating new music in my life. Times where there's music around me that isn't old, and is pleasurable are scarce. Some of these are a bit old, some I haven't fully explored but have good possibilities.

Kate Bush - Aerial
Bjork - Volta
Tori Amos - American Doll Posse
Skye - Mind How You Go

Mars on me

I've been ill all day. Stomach pain, slight nausea, headache, weakness. P says it's probably detox symptoms. It's been just over 2 weeks since I started the program, and all I did was take 1 tablespoon instead of 2 teaspoons of the stuff last night. Not a big increase, but it did worry me that it may be hurting me. I didn't take any today, I couldn't even get around the thought of eating today. So I had a cucumber, some water, tomatoes.. And slept.

I will see how I feel tomorrow morning and continue taking the stuff.

I also decided to have a look at my horoscpope. Last time I was very ill there had been a solar eclipse making a quincunx to my ascendant. I figured anything that is felt on the body deals with the ascendant so I checked it out. And indeed, mars is opposing it: headache without a doubt.

Wind Gusts

My creativity has met a few rough ends, but so far everything's going very well.

These days I've been feeling the toll of stress taking over my body. I'd been feeling weak and drowsy for the past two days.

Today I've awoken to a better apartment than before, but also to a pale and anemic day with snow on the windows. I can't wait for these days to be done for good..

I felt as though I'd awoken in someone else's house today. The uncomfortable and cold feeling of unfamiliar surroundings and events. It crept up on me suddenly, and it reminded me of when all these odd feelings would creep on me all the time when I was younger, and I'd just take them in and make them my own. Like a cloud of gloom, all to myself and anyone who came near me.

Whatever the cause, now I can consciously ask myself where did it come from, why, and does it need to be there. This has worked wonders in changing intrusive moods.

Poetry for the Body

I made this food pyramid for myself a couple of days ago. I wanted to simplify my understanding of my current food consumption, and the way it should be.

I've never been overwheigt in my life, but then I've seldom been a fan of unhealthy foods. My understanding of unhealthy foods has morphed over the years, as I get to understand body mechanics and how food works, better.

I feel that I've got a pretty good understand of these now, after alot of reading and testing, at least for my own body. So I wanted to lay things down and simplify them for myself.

I never really paid attention to the 'proper' food pyramid, but I decided to have a look the other day, least to say it was shocking. Shocking to see how breads and cereals at the very bottom, no wonder people are fat in America..

Then when I pictured what my dinner plate usually looks like, I was just as shocked to realize that the biggest part of my meal is made of grain/starch, then the protein element, and lastly the vegetable element. Now I'm making a conscious effort to swtich the veggies with the grains around, make them occupy the biggest part of the plate, and the grains the smallest.

I'd been eating like this because whenever I think vegetables, I think that it's not 'substancial' enough to keep me through the day. I get low blood sugar problems so anything that gives the impression of being 'solid' has become a safety net.

But the truth is, when my plate is loaded with thoose greens, and topped with a good source of protein, I get just as full, for just as long.

Least to say, I have a love affair with nature. I want to live inside a live tree, dress in leaves and flower petals, and eat nature's delicacies. The green aspect of eating just makes my life more poetic.

Creation Part 2

Today I contemplated the irony of a human being trying to become a caricature, trying to portray a human being.

And I wondered how many spaces does a human occupy, in all possible ways.

Aside from these, I've been feeling great with my projects. At this point I don't really care if I get to display them at the market, I'm overjoyed for just having found simpler ways to create and the new rush of ideas. I suppose I'm in a much better place now than I was not long ago. I can now find something of my own and take it from there. Where as before, I'd just be trying to find something different and that I liked.

Is this the true task of an artist? Is this that point where you discover your Self?

I'm just happy to be this confident and happy.

Creation

I've been so busy today and yesterday. I haven't had much time for any deep thoughts or inner searchings other than finiding a style and technique I can call my own.

I love a distressed look on things, and the ability to grab a bunch of random and seemingly disparate elements and combine them in such harmony, that it looks as though they were always meant to be together.

I love nature, organic, botanical styles along with whismical, ethereal, mystical, and a bit of exotic in the mix.

So far I'm happy with the results of my latest creations, but I'm pretty restless just wanting to see how this and that turned out. After a few more I'll get the hang of it and be able to define and polish things a bit better.

I just started working with polymer clay and I'm completely in love. It makes things so much easier than air dry fiber clay. No need to work in a hurry, no mess, and great detail.

Things look so simple and quick in the mind, but take so much time in real life.. I started when the sun was up, it's been down for a while now, and I'm not even nearly finished.

The Flow

I'd been putting the channeling sessions off for a few months now because there's been much that I needed to work through, and when I'm not feeling my feet on the ground they tend to get me off and uncomfortable.

Last night I felt ready for it and decided to have a look (after the little breakthrough). It was like a personal conversation, even though I was merely listening to someone speak. My current situations were being addressed. That's magic in pure action. He said 'don't compromise yourself', 'astrology is a tool, you created it, it's just a tool', among other things.

Getting the hang of this phenomena, of having the answer before the question is asked requires some serious practice of simplicity. As a result, the things I stress over in my life generally go through a grinder, while the ones I don't, breeze through flawlessly. I try not to even think about stuff, not to complicate it..

So I ran out of tea and even though we went grocery shopping yesterday I forgot to buy tea. After dinner at the inlaws I got a complimentary package of tea without having asked for it. - Another opportunity is in the making today, there's an art faire coming up late this month and for a small fee I can have a table and sell my stuff. I have to sign up but firstly I have to get my hands to work!

Just making sure I have nothing but fun through it, not to mess with the flow..

Monday, April 30, 2007

Lost, Weathered and Found

Saturday, April 28, 2007

Wings

Friday, April 27, 2007

Sparks

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Monday, April 23, 2007

Remnants of Atlantis and the Fall

Sunday, April 22, 2007

Thinking of Sisters

Constructing the Whole

Friday, April 20, 2007

The Petty calls of the Petty, and Staying True

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Pieces Getting Closer

Monday, April 16, 2007

Stepping through the Prism

Sunday, April 15, 2007

A Prism in a Basket

Friday, April 13, 2007

Bouncing

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Empty Spaces

THURSDAY

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Star Notes

Monday, April 09, 2007

The Spark on the Petals

Sunday, April 08, 2007

The Solid Dilema

Saturday, April 07, 2007

Return of the Ice

Friday, April 06, 2007

Mars on me

Wind Gusts

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Poetry for the Body

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Creation Part 2

Monday, April 02, 2007

Creation

Sunday, April 01, 2007

The Flow